One of my long time, very dear friends has the Mom-to-die-for.
When she came to visit when the kids were young, she shooed her daughter out of the house and said, “Go out to dinner with your husband. I want my grandbabies all to myself so I can spoil them.” My own experience with my mom was slightly different. I don’t know if it was the distance of space and/or time, but after living three thousand miles away for nine years, I had imagined her being more like my friends’ moms. So when she came to visit when my daughter was eight months old I happily left my mom with her gorgeous granddaughter for two hours so I could go to an exercise class (hey, back then I still had on my rose colored glasses in more ways than one). When I returned two hours later her mouth was pinched and the negative energy could have propelled me straight into the black hole of the universe. SLAM DUNK! With one flick of her eyebrow. She waited until I tried to suck ass and skipped right to, “hi mom, where would you like me to take you for lunch.” Then she hissed into my ear as I tried to slip past her into my front door, “Don't you DARE do that again. I DIDN’T PAY $400 FOR A PLANE TICKET TO HAWAII TO BE A FUCKING BABYSITTER.”
So, anyway, it’s not about my mom today. Except let’s just say I haven’t asked her for a lot of marriage advice.
Friend’s mom and dad were high school sweethearts. Married at eighteen. First child at nineteen. Whenever I am with her she is SO MUCH FUN. She appears to be very content with her life and much appreciative for all that is good in the world.
One day, about ten years ago, my girlfriend and I were sitting around and trying to figure out why husbands can be so hard to live with sometimes. Why don’t they help out with the kids more??? Why do they ALWAYS expect us to see the movie they want to see? Why oh why do they complain SO MUCH?
So my friend and I decide she’s going to ask her mom her secret to a happy marriage. This is the conversation as related to me later:
Mom, have you ever had days where you wondered if you could live with dad FOREVER? Did you ever think – I just can’t live with this person FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE?
Of course dear. I’ve thought about that with your dad.
Oh. About once a day.