It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness…
Me? I never went to prom. I could say it’s because I was not a prom kind of girl back in the mid ‘70’s, and I’d be mostly correct. I was a beach girl, a horse girl, an organic too-late-to-be-a-hippy-but-almost-a-hippy girl. But the truth of the matter is, no one asked me, no one back then at my high school went stag or in groups of same kind gender, and I was not bold enough to ask a boy.
But my kids have both been to prom, so now I have a terror or two to tell. Both stories involve the shopping for prom wear.
Let’s start with son.
I don’t have any brothers, we’ve already established that I never went to prom, and the only experience I had with tuxedos was when my husband, his best man, and my father showed up wearing them at our wedding. However, I haven’t a clue how or where this came about.
So when Son told me he was asked to prom and he needed my help getting something to wear, I went to the experts.
Hubs went to proms. He said we had to go to a tuxedo shop. That Son should find out what color the girl’s dress was and to get a tux with the tie and/or vest complimenting her gown. If you are wondering why hubs did not take care of getting Son's prom tuxedo himself, you are probably a new reader. Welcome.
Anyways, hubs went to prom like, uhhh, maybe a hundred years ago. So even if that tux shop was still around, he did not remember where it was. He thought it was in Sears…. Seriously.
I called my friend the wedding planner. She knew where all the tux shops were and all the insider’s information on each of them. I made my list of each shop’s specialty.
Then I went to Son.
Hey kid, what kind of tux did you have in mind?
I think a zebra stripe suit would be awesome.
I am serious.
This exact same conversation took place on three separate occasions, so I asked Daughter to call the girl that Son was taking and to ask the girl what she would like Son to show up in.
Prom Date said a tux or suit would be nice. Her dress is red and she seemed really relieved when I asked her. I think she knows about his zebra suit idea.
When it came to the day to go and pick out a tux, Son was out with his friends, so we made plans to meet up in town.
When Son pulled the truck up next to my car, there were three of him. Meaning his two friends had the same longish hair, skater/surfer look as Son. They walked like Son. They even talked like Son. They were the Patty Duke triplets of the skater scene.
A visual aid for those too young for the Patty Duke reference. Go ahead. We'll wait.
The boys wanted to come tux shopping with us. They thought it would be fun. You just never know what is going to get their interest these days. Next thing you know, they will ask to grocery shopping with me.
When we got there, the man working the counter appealed to the boys. His head was shaved, he had a goatee, and intricate ink covered most of his forearms. I think they figured him a sympathetic audience to their antics. Their questions emerged in Beavis and Butthead fashion.
Do you have a tuxedo in zebra print?
How about a cheetah print?
You know what would be really cool? A tux made out of ‘70’s shag carpet material.
Ho, yeah baby. Like in orange.
Do you have that?
The tuxedo man is staring at them. Then he says,
I can get you a plaid tux in lime green.
The boys chuckle.
That might be kind of cool. Let’s see that one.
Meanwhile, Daughter and I are just standing there, enjoying the side show. However, I feel it is time for me to step up to the plate.
I say to tuxedo man,
but I’m paying for this. I have no intention of sending him off to pick up that poor girl in a lime green plaid tuxedo.
The Boy didn’t put up a fight as Daughter and I selected a glorious black tux with a deep red tie and vest. His friends walked down to the nearest fast food outlet to rev up their batteries. They'd had their fun.
The only other highlight was the fitting, where the 6’1” 138 pound teen looked absolutely stunning in pants that came half way up his ankles and a jacket that stopped mid forearms. He could have been a Dickens’s urchin and I could kick myself for not having my camera.
If you want to see how it all turned out, it is here in this post.
The boys did say that next year they are ALL going to go and they will plan ahead so they all find zebra, cheetah, or shag carpet tuxedos. I’ll make sure my camera is ready.
Part Two, Daughter’s prom shopping tomorrow.
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