Monday, August 3, 2009

Kindergartners, Just Ten Years Later: A Spin Cycle Rerun

The Spin Cycle this week is to repost your favorite post.

Now, my actual favorite post is Sometimes There are Worse Things Than Nipplage. But I have reposted it before, plus it ran on Mid-Life Bloggers. So I think a lot of you have read it. It's my favorite because I think it is probably one of my best written pieces. It is one of the few that went through a revision. I kept at it a couple of days and tweaked it to get it where I liked, other than writing and posting on the same day, which is what I usually do. Also, it reminds me not to take myself too seriously - a lesson taught to me during my breast cancer days.

The post I'm spinning is my favorite post about the fun of working with teenagers. Since I just got started with a new class of sophomores, I thought it apropos to repost something about teaching. This post was inspired by Vodka Mom, who always posts the cute things her kindergartners say in class. One day while reading her blog, I thought to myself, "To think my students were that cute and innocent only 10 years ago..."

And here we go...

The following is a cross section of the first five minutes of four different classes, plus walking onto campus. The names have been changed to protect the little darlings.

Walking onto campus 45 minutes before school starts. I come through the back stairwell and a male student has a female student plastered against the wall. I'm grateful that at least they have their clothes on, know what I mean?

Hey! Knock it off.

No separation, but dirty looks in my direction.

Seriously. You two need to get out of here.

No separation. Dirtier looks in my direction.

I have a digital camera in my purse and I’m not afraid to use it. Do I need to show your mothers a picture of what you are doing?

Girl looks freaked out (finally), but boy looks like he would gladly slice my throat.

Between first bell and tardy bell:(Jan) Do you know how much the health room charges for a pad? (Me) Sorry, no. But do you need a pass to the health room to go get one? (Jan) What if I don’t have enough money? (Me) I guess you have to work that out with the health room aid. (Sadie)Hi Miss. Are we going to work on our poems today? (Bill) Why do we have to write poems? It’s not my thing. (Bob)I’m going to put a shriek bat in my poem. Miss, do you know what a shriek bat is? Do you play blah blah video game? (James) Why would you put a shriek bat in your poem? You’re supposed to write a poem about yourself. (Bob) EXCUSE ME. Maybe some of us are using similes and metaphors like we are supposed to. (James) Oh, my bad, you are so like a shriek bat. (Tom) Your mother's like a shriek bat. (Lily) Miss, can you sign my permission form? I’m going to be a tour guide for the students who are visiting from Japan next week. (Marie, Tilly, Helen, Fred, Kent – all digging into their backpacks or binders) OH! Me too. Me too. My form too. (Darlene) Hi Miss. I just got back from our family reunion. Do you have my work from last week? (Me) Darlene, review the make-up policy and come to see me in tutoring after school. Class, the tardy bell will ring in about 30 seconds. You need to be seated at that time. (Donald) Can I get a drink of water? (Me) Do I ever give you permission to be late to my class? (Ronald) Can I use the bathroom? (Me) Do I ever give you permission to be late to my class? Class. That IS the tardy bell. You can use the ten minutes of SST to study for your quiz. (Susie, Bobbie, and Chad)What Quiz?? (Me) The one that has been posted on the board and on my website for the last week. I’d like to remind you all that if you don’t know what is going on in class, you shouldn’t announce it. (Sadie) Miss. Lynn is crying in the hall. (Me, outside in hall) Lynn – are you OK? (Lynn, balling her eyes out) Miss, can I go to the health room? (Me) Of course. But are you OK? Do I need to call for a security cart to drive you? (Lynn) No. Snuffle. My boyfriend broke up with me just now. I can’t go to class like this. I need to lie down.

For more spins, head on over to Sprite's Keeper. She links all the posts on Friday.

New feature in the sidebar. Click on the sunset to find a great post.

Also, I haven't begged in awhile, but I'm tied for first with Dooce for Lord's sake in the blogger's choice awards. If you didn't cast a vote and are so inclined, I have to admit, it would be awesome to win. You can click on the badge to get there.My site was nominated for The Blogitzer!

36 comments:

Kristan said...

OMIGOD tied with Dooce?! That's awesome!! I already voted. I wonder if I can do it again...

mo.stoneskin said...

I was about to ask for permission to be late for class but I'm going to ignore the urge.

Sprite's Keeper said...

I think I would need a lie down myself after dealing with that fishbowl chatter. I can just HEAR the questions stomping over each other! You're linked and I need to head over to make sure you don't get DOOCE'D!

only a movie said...

I loved this one the first time... good stuff. xxoo

JennyMac said...

I certainly wont be late either! And I will lob a vote your way today!

JennyMac said...

Just voted and enjoy that lead. :)

blueviolet said...

You could write a book too about all the teenage crap you see and hear!

Michele said...

Are you sure you don't work at our campus? This sounds vaguely like some of our faculty.

darsden said...

LOL :-)

Maggie said...

You got my vote! ;)

bernthis said...

this is exactly why I would be better working with animals, the real kind not the human version

Maureen at IslandRoar said...

I'm sure I'm not the first to tell you you're a saint!
Very funny and very realistic.
Okay, I just hit the badge and went to try and vote,and got all confused.
Am I just dumb, or where am I supposed to go when I get there?

Anna See said...

Aaaah the memories! Thanks for the classroom flashback.

I can't remember if I voted, but I'm heading over right now to see!

Amy said...

I am back and I was so happy to read your post. Thanks for doing it. This post was great also. What were those students thinking. Not coming apart. I thought maybe they got stuck because of braces.

otin said...

It is amazing that you make it through a whole year!! That is almost as dysfunctional as my family!!! LOL!

Kathy said...

You are now AHEAD of Dooce!!! YAY!!!~

And I loved this post first time 'round, too! :)

Beth said...

This is/was one of my favorite of your posts!

I voted, too!

Joanie M said...

Apparently I already voted but as of 8 pm ET on 8/3/09, you are 1 vote ahead!

Hit 40 said...

2 more weeks off!!! I shall soak in the sun!!

King of New York Hacks said...

Dooce ?? Who the hell is Dooce ?? You're a lock !!

Jan said...

I remember this post! And it tickles me just as much today as it did when you first published it.

*munch, munch, munch* I have some REALLY good snack mix some lovely lady sent me. I am looking into buying a vat.

#167 Dad said...

I feel you teach. I'm a high school teacher as well.
I have a couple of strategies for the face suckers. Sometimes they'll separate when I get right in between them and sing THAT'S AMORE as loud and off key as I can. Sometimes screaming at them works - something like, "Hey! what do you two mallet heads think this is, Paris France?"

#167 Dad said...

I feel you teach. I'm a high school teacher as well.
I have a couple of strategies for the face suckers. Sometimes they'll separate when I get right in between them and sing THAT'S AMORE as loud and off key as I can. Sometimes screaming at them works - something like, "Hey! what do you two mallet heads think this is, Paris France?"

Melissa B. said...

Yup. It's the kids who make it fun. Certainly not Principal Man!

The Stiletto Mom said...

OMG. I have one year left in elementary school with my son...then Jr. High. I was already scared but now I can think a few years ahead to high school! Am convinced I am being paid back for the drama I caused...which sounded familiar in your post sadly. *bows head in shame and backs out of room...*

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

You have the patience of a saint. Hopefully when Princess Nagger gets to that grade level she'll have an awesome teacher like you. ;)

I voted for you, of course!! Go Pseudo, Go!! :)

Debbie said...

I try not to think about what is going on in the high school. Yes, denial works for me.
Go girl! Beat Dooce:)

Dingo said...

I think I got a contact headache from reading that constant stream of chatter. I'm going to go lie down now.

Casey said...

Ha, I miss working at a high school sometimes for the teenage drama factor. I caught a couple going for worse than making out in the hallway once and got a similar reaction. Seriously, get a room or a car or something, don't pull that crap at school. Also, I remember your post about the girl saying how cold it was and using some choice language. That one cracked me up.

Gaston Studio said...

I think Otin said it with 'dysfunctional' LOL! Already voted sweetie!

Smart Mouth Broad said...

I must be truly evil because I laughed out loud at "I've got to ly down" for a broken heart. I know it's true, you do have to ly down but it just struck me funny. I had a visual of Scarlett O'hara.

Mama Badger said...

I'm so happy those days are done and gone. I don't remember feeling that a breakup was a tragedy, and I'm happy about that.

Columbia Lily said...

wow that sounds so familiar. I hear those exact conversations every day!!! Good to know that sophomores are the same no matter where you are. I like the camera idea a lot. I usually announce very loudly to STOP SUCKING HER FACE OFF FOR CRYING OUT LOUD AND HOW WILL YOU EVER SURVIVE 50 MINUTES WITHOUT SPEAKING TO EACH OTHER!!!!! and about half the time it works...they laugh and walk away.

creative kerfuffle said...

WOW that you are tied w/ dooce. omg--i feel not worthy to read your blog now! but--i do so enjoy it : ) i'll vote for you of course.
and those snippets of conversations make me realize i could never be a high school teacher. i don't have the patience.

Kingsmom said...

I totally felt like I was back in school. That was great.

msprimadonna67 said...

Sounds about like everyday here!